I sauntered into the office at the BBC World Service shortly before 9am and headed straight to my desk, where I placed my piping hot coffee and the sandwich I got from Benjie along Queen’s Road in Holborn. As I was removing my jacket to get on with the task of the day, I noticed an official looking envelope placed prominently in the middle of my desk. While still on my feet and the jacket halfway off my shoulder, curiosity propelled me to open the envelope to take a peep at the content.

I froze as my eyes scanned the letter head which curiously bore the insignia of the UK Ministry of Defence. The body of the letter was even more horrifying. It read something like, “Due to the current mobilisation for imminent military engagements in the Middle East, the Parliament has passed a bill enabling the UK Ministry of Defence to embark on conscription into the army. You have been selected for this process and should report forthwith at the A Company, 4th Battalion E15 3QW.” The letter went on to say that failure to report for enlistment within 48 hours constituted criminal offence, punishable with imprisonment.

I suddenly envisioned myself dressed in army fatigue, fighting with others in the Middle East. At that time, Saddam Hussein who was the dictator ruling the country of Iraq had invaded the oil rich Kuwait, its tiny neighbour. The World was in opprobrium, especially the West, as it was the first time after several decades that a country would invade another country to annexe it. Saddam Hussein was told in very strong terms that he must withdraw his troops or face the wrath of a coalition of armies from around the world. He replied with belligerence and threatened that he was ready to give them the ‘mother of all battles.’ Thus, began frantic mobilisation of troops, especially by the American and UK governments.

I looked up from reading the letter and tried to see if my other colleagues were aware of my predicament, or were looking in my direction. I particularly tried to catch the attention of Wale, a male colleague who enjoyed both Nigerian and British citizenship, he seemed to be engrossed in whatever he was doing. I would have liked to know if there were others in my shoes who have received a call up letter to join the army, but they all seemed to be anyone would ask me questions, but just as I was about to reach the door, the whole office roared into uproarious laughter. It was a hoax! A wicked colleague, Wale, had concocted the plan and got the buy-in of other colleagues.